


* You're Here For A  G O O D  T I M E

by mageo



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Accidental Soul Bonding, And neither is Sans sooo, Angst, F/F, F/M, Fluff to smut to angst ratio really just depends on how it turns out honestly, Heavy Feels, I hope you guys like dark stuff, I'm mostly playing it by ear, If you want to replace their name with yours go ahead my dude, Implied Drug Use, M/M, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Not gonna be super long probably, Partying and club stuff, Possessive Sans, Probably tons of it, Rape/Non-con - Freeform, Reader Is Not Frisk, Reader is named, Smut, Some Fluff, You're no stranger to fooling around, i can't tag, idk - Freeform, just read it, reader has lady parts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-12
Updated: 2017-06-27
Packaged: 2018-11-13 04:30:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11177067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mageo/pseuds/mageo
Summary: MAY OR MAY NOT FINISH. See, I went through a period of time where I decided not to write anymore. But I'm back! And... I don't remember what I had going on here. But! I'll continue it if people even remember it's here, and if they want me to.You love life, every bit of it. Especially YOUR life. You're hot, sexy, cool, and you love to party. Every Friday and Saturday night, baby. You rarely say no to a good time, and you're always dragging someone home. But when a hot new club in the city takes a violent turn for the worst, you wind up taking home more than you can handle when a couple of monsters have to drag your unconscious body back to your apartment.You don't expect them to befriend you, but that's just how monsters are, you guess. It's obvious that they don't really approve of the way you spend your free time, but you'll continue doing what you want, no matter how "dangerous" it is.Tension between you and one of your new friends starts to form, and while you're not sure what it means exactly, you are sure of two things. One, he can't seem to leave you alone. And two... you kind of like it.





	1. You Swear That Your Usual Clubs Never Get This Violent

 

 

_Memories tend to just pop up_

_Drunk pre-meds and some rubber gloves_

Bodies sway to the beat, yours along with them. You can barely hear yourself think over the pounding of the music, and that's just the way you like it. You've never been to this club before, but after only half an hour inside, you've decided you love it.

_Five-thousand people with designer drugs_

_Don't think I'll ever get enough_

And holy cow, this DJ is phenomenal. The bass seems to spike at just the right moments, and the songs that play get your blood pumping. You sing along with the lyrics, since this is one of your favorites. _"Champagne, cocaine, gasoline! And most things in between! I roam the city in a shopping cart! A pack of camels and a smoke alarm!"_   You're not a good singer—if you can call your screeches singing. But no one else seems to care about your dying cat sounds, and some people even join you. _"This night is heating up! Raise hell and turn it up! Saying 'if you go out you might pass out in a drain pipe!' Oh yeah, don't threaten me with a good time!"_

You feel this song deep in your veins. This song understands you.

When the song ends, you motion for your bestie to join you in the bathroom. She begrudgingly leaves her current man candy and follows you.

"What the _hell_ , Jordan? That guy was hot," she hisses at you as soon as the door closes behind you. You don't answer, you just check bathroom stalls. Yep, all empty. You giggle at your best friend before locking the door, and soon she's catching on and giggling too, opening the windows at the top of the opposite wall. "Oh man, you should have told me sooner! I'd have brought some of my stuff too."

The both of you take a seat on the floor, leaning against the wall under one of the windows. You take out a small sandwich bag from your little black handbag, the smell of the contents already wafting up to your nostrils. "Time to get fucked _up._ "

An hour later, you're rocking the most glorious high, and grinding against the guy, Jason or something, that you dragged your friend away from earlier. You think she probably left or something, still pissed that you threw up on her shoes. You don't really care too much about her though, you only just met her two weeks ago.

When the music gets heated, you begin to feel hands creep up along your sides. One stops at your thigh, the other at your waist. You hear Jason whisper seductively in your ear, lips pressed close enough to touch skin. "Wanna get out of here?" His grip tightens slightly, as if to emphasize the meaning behind his words, and you can feel his lower hand tug at the edge of your tight mini-skirt.

If he thinks you're out for the night already, he's got another thing coming. You've still got another two hours of dancing and drinking left in you. "Maybe later, boo," you whisper back, only to hear his disappointed groan, and feel his body heat leave yours. He walks off to go hit on another, drunker girl. But you just shrug and continue dancing. There's plenty more ass where he came from.

You leave the dancefloor after another two songs, taking a seat at the bar. You know that some people can smell the drugs on you, but none of them care. Most of them are packing much heavier stashes. You order two Kinky Fucks, a somewhat new drink that mixes a hard vodka product called Kinky with pineapple juice, orange juice, and a shot of cranberry. You drink them fast, then turn around on your stool to survey the mass of people.

In the DJ booth sits a monster, a ghost to be precise. Most monsters avoid places like this, too good and nice to bother with the edgier parts of the city. By now you were used to rarely seeing them, except at school or normal places like grocery stores. But tonight there are more here than usual, all gathered around close to the stage, cheering the ghost DJ on. You bet that the ghost is new here, and like every other monster, has a lot of friends that support him.

Just as you're about to order another drink, a pinã colada probably, you hear the whine of a microphone that got turned on too close to a speaker, followed by the  _tap tap_ of someone using their finger to test the sound.

"Good evening, darlings," an androgynous electronic voice comes through the speakers. Just on stage, an almost-feminine robot monster stands next to the DJ booth, his metal gleaming in the club lights. "It is so _lovely_  to be here tonight."

The crowd gives a drunken cheer, and you hear someone next to you whisper, "Dude, that's Mettaton."

"My dear cousin Blooky here has been doing a wonderful job tonight, don't you think?" The crowd gives another cheer, and some people raise their glasses. The ghost DJ blushes. "Well you're in for a treat, cause this little ghostie is going to be joining me on tour! Isn't that exciting?"

The crowd gives less enthusiastic cheers, already becoming bored with the distraction and going back to dancing and chatting. Mettaton doesn't seem to notice.

"In honor of his debut, I've decided to give two of you lucky patrons free tickets to my first show here in New York next Saturday night!" The crowd roars up again, hearing the magic word  _free._ "Now, the rules of this game are simple." Boos ring out. "Oh yes darlings, you're gonna have to play a game. Nothing in life is ever free, and all that jazz."

Mettaton gestures down to someone in the crowd below him, and a tall skeleton monster in an orange silk button down and red scarf joins him on stage. "Everyone who wants to participate needs to find a partner—I've got mine." The skeleton blushes, cheekbones turning a bright orange to match his shirt. "Then you're gonna hold hands. Like so." The robot demonstrates by holding his partner's hand up in the air, causing the poor guy's blush to deepen. "The longer you can keep those hands up, the better. The last remaining couple gets the tickets, as well as a lovely all-expenses-paid date at my restaurant."

It only takes fifteen minutes for people to find partners, everyone interested in winning the dinner/concert date scrambling to find someone else who's also interested in it. By the start of the game, half of the club is holding hands with each other.

"Not gonna join them?" The bartender sets down your pinã colada, motioning towards a group of guys. "They look like they could use the company."

You shrug in response, grabbing your drink and sliding off your seat. You turn your head back to say, "Dates aren't really my thing, you know?"

You throw back your drink, not paying attention to where you're going. "Does everyone here have a partner?" You pass by a speaker right as Mettaton speaks again, causing you to nearly choke on your drink, and it spills down your face.

"woah there, don't need to go  _nuts_ over him. he's only a minor celebrity."

Fruity alcoholic beverage dripping down your chin in the most undignified manner, you turn your head to find another skeleton monster, this one much shorter and stockier. You raise an eyebrow at him, questioning the emphasis on one of the words in his sentence. Beads of sweat form at the top of his skull, and he looks down. "you know? 'cause of your drink? coco _nuts_?"

You raise another eyebrow, this time because that was a stretch. Coconuts aren't even nuts. "yeah, i know, my jokes aren't really landing tonight. i promise they're usually better."

 _I'm sure they are pal_ , you think, and nod. You grab some napkins from the sound booth nearby and wipe your face down, not the least bit embarrassed by your spill. Kind of a waste of a drink, honestly. "Sorry if I got any of that on you, it might get sticky," you apologize, offering some of the napkins. He shakes his head no, and you go back to sipping what's left of your drink.

"that was a quick recovery," he notes. "must be used to making messes."

"You don't know the half of it," you chuckle. "I'm a klutz."

"i'm just messy. nice to metcha, klutz." He extends his hand, and you shake it awkwardly. Who the hell shakes hands anymore?

"Hey nerd! Are you gonna join the game?" A loud voice booms over all the other nearby voices—and you are talking  _loud._ After all, this is a club. It's almost hard to hear the people in front of you speak sometimes. "Who's this punk?" A large fish woman with blue gills and flaming red hair pushes through the crowd, dragging behind a flustered yellow lizard monster. "Don't tell me you actually want to win tickets to go see his lame show."

"nah, just met a nice girl and thought i'd introduce myself. name's actually sans, by the way."

"Jordan," you reply.

Her eyes narrow, staring accusingly at your joined hands, having never separated after shaking. "If you're not doing the competition, then why are you both holding hands?"

You shrug. "We shook hands, you know, like people used to do back in the old days when they met someone new."

"why are you two holding hands?"

The little almost-a-dinosaur blushes and hides behind the other woman. "Because, we're going to show everyone here that we're the best couple!" The fish woman shouts, causing a few passerby to shoot glares at her. "We'll probably give the tickets to Bratty and Catty." She shoves her thumb in the direction of two monster girls on the other side of the club, a chubby purple cat and a tall blonde aligator, both aggressively holding each other's hands. "I think they'll try and slice someone for them."

You feel a cold, metallic hand clamping shut around your conjoined hands, and a voice rings out from behind you. "Sans, what a wonderful surprise to see you participating! But you know, if you wanted tickets, all you had to do was ask." Mettaton releases your hands, and you both let go, rousing a pout to form on his lips. Standing next to him and gripping his other hand stands the other skeleton. "Oh boo, you've already lost."

"oh geez, would ya look at that. i guess i'm out of luck," Sans answered, an edgy undertone added to his otherwise pretty casual voice. "i guess i won't get to see your show then."

"NONSENSE, BROTHER! YOU ONLY HAVE TO ASK, AND METTATON CAN PUT YOU AND YOUR NEW GIRLFRIEND ON THE VIP LIST," the taller skeleton shouted, trying to be helpful. You can't help but think that he overdid it with his volume trying to be heard over the music.

But wait— _girlfriend_ _?_ Oh no, you barely know even know this guy!

"GIRLFRIEND? Sans, you  _dog_ _!_ We've only been out for a couple of hours!" The fish woman grins at you, showing off razor sharp teeth.

"I-I can ship it," her girlfriend sounds from behind her.

"I've known this guy for like, four minutes, tops," you state, holding up your hands and backing up a couple steps. "I'm not in a relationship with anyone, so that train can just go right back to the station."

Sans nods in agreement, a couple more beads of sweat forming from the embarassment. "yeah, and i don't really date either."

"Oh, but can't you see?" Mettaton pushes the both of you together, albeit awkwardly, since one of his hands is otherwise preoccupied. "He's too shy to ask a pretty girl like you to dance, so he probably just tried to make a few jokes to see if he could get you to laugh. It's positively  _adorable,_ ain't it Pappy?"

The tall skeleton nods enthusiastically. "THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HE WOULD DO!"

Sans doesn't react to the accusation, instead remaining silent, and more on edge. You can sense his need for a drink and decide to make up an excuse to get you two away from them all. "Oh Sans, that sounds like such a wonderful idea," you say, overselling it a bit. You shoot him a wink, and his grin widens when he understands what you're trying to do. "You simply must take me to the dancefloor. Over  _there_." You point towards the bar, which isn't anywhere near the dancefloor.

"sounds  _wine_ to me."

You hear groans from his friends at the pun, but you can't help but chuckle a little, 'cause this one makes sense. "See now that, that was a good one."

"great to know i still got it."

"You never had it! Now go tell bad jokes somewhere else!" Undyne leaves, taking her date. She waves goodbye shyly as she follows behind her.

"Well, anyway, we've got a date with Jack Daniels, so we should probably skedaddle." You leave Mettaton and Sans' brother, and you take a seat at the bar, patting the seat next to yours. Sans quickly occupies it.

"uh, thanks."

"For what?" You check out the small menu of appetizer-like foods, suddenly feeling hungry. Ooh, cheese fries sound  _amazing._ You forgot that you're totally baked right now, so used to the calm feeling. You've got the munchies real bad.

You hope Sans doesn't notice. "for getting us away from mettaton and the others. i don't really want to be pestered about relationships right now. i just came here to have a good time."

You ask the bartender to get you a large order of cheese fries, and you order two shots of whatever the guy decides to bring you.

"Well, you know what they say. You can't drink your problems away," you say as the bartender hands you the finished drinks. "But you can give it a  _shot_."

His drink comes flying through his nose hole as he erupts into a laughing fit. "oh man, i've gotta remember that one."

You spend a lot of the night with Sans up at the bar, exchanging jokes. When the giggles kept coming even after the jokes stopped, the bartender cut you both off.

"so uh, you doing anything after this?" Sans asks, a now-cold cheese fry in his bony hand.

You shake your head, completely beat. You probably won't even try to flirt your way into bringing someone home, you're so tired. "I'm probably gonna crash as soon as I get home, to be honest," you answer. "But I'm free tomorrow night, if you want to hang out. I'll probably be here."

"cool, cool." His grin turns soft, and he pulls out his cell phone. "i'll give you my number, you can shoot me a text with a time later." You happily exchange contact information with him.

You swing your purse over your shoulder, getting up and just about to leave, when a warm pair of hands grab your butt and squeeze. The Jason guy from earlier stands in front of you, arms wrapped around you. He pulls you closer and starts to whisper to you. "What about that 'maybe later' option, eh? You seem to be ready to go home now. Come home with me?" He pleads with you, trying to sound hot, but his words are slurred from drinking beyond his limit. He presses his body into yours suggestively, and you lightly shove him back.

"Not now dude, I'm too tired for it," you answer, and start to walk away from him.

He grabs your wrist and spins you back around to face him, and he puts his mouth right by your ear like before, only with less practiced seduction and more drunken desperation. "Don't worry, you don't have to do anything but lay down, baby..." You feel the sickening sensation of something wet sliding along your neck, and you assume that those are suppose to be kisses. It feels more like he's just rubbing his wet lips all over you. You try and push him away, saying that you aren't interested, but his grip tightens, holding you in place. "You're coming home with me, bitch, so stop trying to get away."

You pull your free hand up to slap the shit out of him, for even  _trying_ to get his way with you, but the grip on your wrist releases, and he gets shoved back by a stronger, invisible force.

"hey man, the lady said she wasn't interested. just beat it dude." Sans arm circles your shoulders comfortingly, probably thinking you might be terrified by this prick's behavior. But nah, not really. You've come across more than a dozen guys like him. _Hi_ _s arm sure feels nice anyway though,_ you think to yourself.

"Are you serious?" The guy stands back up, face red with anger and embarrassment. The entire bar area and some of the dancefloor people are watching you now, eager to see some kind of fight to break out. "You're refusing to go home with me, just so you can go fuck some monster trash?"

You curl your lip in disgust at his xenophobic attitude, instantly glad that you shut him down earlier, too.

"You filthy whore," he spits out before turning to leave.

"weren't  _you_ the one trying to get your dick wet by preying on a woman who repeatedly told you no? maybe you guys have different standards than we monsters do, but i think you're calling out the wrong human here." Sans shrugs, setting his hands in his hoodie pockets casually. You grin at his excellent comeback, telling yourself to remember to high five him later.

"Let's just go, Jackson," someone, you assume a friend, says. He pulls on his arm, trying to lead him away, but the Jason guy (who's name apparently  _isn't_ Jason) remains in place.

"You dirty monster fucker, I wouldn't want to fuck you if you were the last girl on earth, and your pussy vibrated." He grins, feeling proud of his vulgar statement, which wasn't really clever enough to compete with Sans' great one. But he seems to think it was on par, and his confidence pisses you off.

"The tent pitched in your pants is telling me a  _very_ different story," you simply state, nodding to the not-very-well-hidden erection pressed against his pants. Sans huffs in amusement, but he still looks angry. The white pinprick pupils that rested in his sockets have gone dim, and you get the feeling that means something bad.

"just leave her alone, dude. or else you'll be in for a pretty bad time," sans threatens in a deep voice, almost like a growl.

Jackson doesn't take the hint, and presses forward, a mere three inches from the two of you now. "Is that a threat?"

Ever the brave little uncaring shit that you are, you push your luck. "Bitch it might be."

"Alright, ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please? We have our winners!" Mettaton's voice joins the background noise, and you can hear the victory shouts of the aggressive fish woman you met earlier join him. You're looking up at them, watching her and her girlfriend walk across the stage when you feel the palm of a hand strike your face.

"oh  _hell_ no. you did not just strike her, knowing full well that  _you're_ the one that deserves the ass kicking." You turn your sore face back to the situation at hand, with Jackson's tomato-red angry face and Sans' calm fury. His pupils are completely gone.

"And what are you going to do about it, short shit?" There's no way this dude knows how to read an atmosphere.

Rather than respond with words, Sans' left eye blazes blue, and bones pop out from behind him, glowing blue and floating around. Sans snaps his fingers, and the bones race toward Jackson, pelting him with attacks. His burnt orange soul bursts out of his chest, and his HP starts to drop. Instead of doing the smart thing and backing down, Jackson leaps forward, trying to swing at Sans. The skeleton ducks, sending another volley of bones. By now, security has caught wind of the situation, and is rushing in to break up the fight. Mettaton tries, and fails, to recapture the audience.

The security guards grab Sans first, since he's the one landing the hits. Sans relents, not wanting to cause any more trouble. The bones disappear, and Jackson is grabbed by bouncers as well.

"Well that's all for tonight my gorgeous guys and gals!" Mettaton's voice sounds out real fast, trying to hurry off stage. "Have a lovely night!"

You follow security as they escort the assailant and your new friend outside. The bouncers throw Sans and Jackson into the dirty alley just outside the entrance, one of them adding a "Don't come back."

Sans rubs his wristbone, probably hurt from the grip the large guards had on him. His grin doesn't falter at all, and he looks up from the ground at you, standing there with your arm out, offering to help him up. He takes it, coming up to his full height, just barely taller than you are. "looks like we're not gonna be able to meet here again tomorrow night, huh?"

You chuckle, then nuckle bump him. "I guess not. Damn dude, those were some sweet moves!"

"You were going to meet him here again? You slut," Jackson groans from the dirty ground, rolling over and sitting up to face you both. "You're lucky my friends aren't here right now. We'd give you a good, hard lesson about what happens to pretty girls that mess around with _their kind_." His last two words sound menacing, but you don't feel threatened by him.

"I get to spend my time with degenerates like you, right? Yeah, I think I like the way things are going for me right now, actually. Don't go to any trouble just for little 'ol me," you coo, then follow it with a mocking snicker. "Please, you can barely stand after the number Sans did on you."

The guy scowls, having to lean against the wall for support. "Yeah, well don't hold your breath. I sent my boys a text before we got kicked out, so they should be here soon to put your monster-loving ass back in its place," he spits, bloody grin plastering his face. Sans must've hit him harder than you thought.

"Yeah, well bring it, punk!" The fish woman from before races out of the bar, followed by her girlfriend, Mettaton, and Sans' brother. "We've got your back, don't we Sans?"

Sans shoves his hands in his hoodie pockets, and he nods. "sure do."

"I dare you to try something against Papyrus and I here!" The woman flexes her muscles, which there are a lot of, and places her arm on the tall skeleton's shoulder. "And don't you dare underestimate us, punk! We'll knock your ass flat."

"THAT'S RIGHT! YOU NEVER MESS WITH THE PAPYRUS-UNDYNE DUO!"

Jackson shrugs, not losing his smile. He glances down at his phone. "I guess we're going to have to see about that."

You call for two taxis while they continue to exchange threats, and the taxi company says that it'll be a half hour delay due to the influx of drunk weekend partyers all needing rides home. You all have no choice but to wait around for them, with the possible threat of more human asshats showing up to create more trouble.

You hope that the taxis beat out the guy's friends, but sadly, the screeching of tires on pavement and the odor of tobacco and whisky signal the arrival of said trouble after only ten minutes pass.

"Oh, you're in for it now, freaks!"

Rough, drunken laughter leaves the car parked next to you in alley, and four guys step out. The guy from the driver's seat nods towards your waiting group, who are already tense and waiting for things to come to blows. "These the guys you were talking about, Jack?"

He nods, shit eating grin lighting up his face. "This monster-loving chick blew me off for this short fuck, and when I tried to convince her otherwise, he attacked me."

"That's not cool," the man says, looking you up and down. It's not hard to get a good look at you, since you're only wearing a tight black skirt that reaches your mid-thigh, and a black tank top under a loose off-the-shoulder navy middrift tee. You didn't even bother with leggings. His grin widens as his eyes rest on your chest. "Don't you know what happens to little girls that play around with guys they shouldn't?"

"I wouldn't know," you answer with a snarky attitude. "My new friend here stopped that from happening to me."

Sans snickers. You hold out your hand beside you, palm up, and he slaps it.

"Enough talk!" Jackson shouts. "Beat their asses already, and put the girl in the back of the car."

"You guys really want to do this, huh?" Undyne rolls her head along her neck, causing a cracking sound. "Alphys, babe, why don't you and Jordan go sit over there? We've got this."

Her small yellow companion nods, and nervously faces you, as if to ask you to follow her to the other side of the alley.

"Oh no, babycakes," one of the men that came from the backseat says, reaching forward to grab you before anyone else can react. "You're coming with us."

"Don't worry, we'll show you a fun time," another loser says. "You're gonna have a much better time with us."

The sound of magic being summoned fills the air, and you're being shoved into the back of their trash-littered vehicle. You're not one to take a kidnapping laying down though, and soon you're kicking him in the face, suddenly wishing you'd gone with heels instead of flats tonight. Your kicks aren't enough to push him down though, and you only manage to piss him off. He roughly backhands you, a large ring on his hand hitting your lip and causing it to bust. A few drops of your blood flow onto his fingers, and he seductively licks them up.

"Ooh baby, you know what gets me goin'." His greasy voice gives you the shivers, and soon you're kicking him again, much harder this time.

"You dirty!" Kick. "Kinky!" Kick. "Ugly!" Kick. "Disgusting!" Kick. "Piece of trash!" Your last kick sends him stumbling back, and he lands on his ass in the middle of the commotion. One of the other lackeys trips over him, and he falls on his ass too.

Mettaton, who was chasing him with mini bombs coming out of slits in his palm, laughs very loudly. "Looks like it's the end of the line for you lowlifes!"

You jump out of the vehicle, preparing yourself to kick some ass if need be. The four guys seem to be handled though, with Undyne and Papyrus trading blows with who you assume is their leader, Mettaton tossing out bombs towards the humans in front of you, and Sans' bone attacks chasing after the last guy.

You're about to join in with Mettaton, probably to stomp on their faces since they're already on the ground, when you notice that the prick from earlier is gone, and so is Alphys.

_Oh shit._

You race out of the alley, only to be greeted with random passerby on the sidewalk. You're about to give up and check the other alley exit when you hear a muffled scream, and you turn to see Jackson dart into the alley a block over, dragging Alphys' crying form in his arms.

You don't heistate to run after them, and you're surprised to see Jackson waiting for you, pocket knife pressed up against the poor monster's face. You ball up your fist and swing it back, preparing to knock the guy's teeth out.

"Ah ah ah! Don't come any closer. Wouldn't want my hand to slip and cause a little  _accident,_ now would we?" His hand inches closer, and the knife begins to cut a shallow slit in her scales. A white upside down heart emerges from her chest, and the HP drops a single point. "Wow," he comments. "Not much defense on this one, huh?"

"You let her go," you ground out, pushing yourself forward another step.

"Or what? You're going to cry? That won't stop me." His eyes widen at the thought, and his sadistic grin turns pervy. "Actually, maybe it will. I want you to cry and beg for me, and I might consider letting her go."

"Oh  _fuck_ that," you answer, and you toss your purse at his face. It's not heavy enough to hurt, but it's sudden enough to throw him off. His knife drops from Alphys' face, and you tackle him, accidentally taking the poor monster with you. You straddle his stomach, throwing a punch in his face for good measure. Alphys reacts just as quickly as you hoped, grabbing the knife out of his hand.

"You little bitch! How dare you?" He swings his arm around, trying to grab back the knife, but Alphys was already scooting out of the way. He settles for your hair instead, dragging your face down to his. "I'm going to beat your ass so hard, you don't even know," he seethes.

 _"Bite me,"_ you hiss back, and spit in his face. He licks your saliva off his lips, shooting a disgusting smirk your way.

"If you insist." Jackson uses his strength to push you off him, flipping you over and slamming you onto the concrete. Your vision fades to black for half a second, and the buildings to both sides of you go blurry when it fades back. Pain shoots from the back of your skull, a dull pound that makes it hard for you to think clearly. You look up to signal for Alphys to run, but she's already gone. He laughs at you, his disgusting boner digging into your thigh with every shake. "Oh her? She ran off. Guess you can't trust those freaks to help, can you?" His mouth falls down to your neck, licking at the skin there and leaving a line of drool that would normally disgust you, but now only terrifies you. He bites down hard, and you scream at the sharp pain that follows, and you feel more liquid running down and mixing with his spit.

He sits up to admire his handiwork, and you grit your teeth at the satisfied expression on his shit face. "Now  _that's_ a love bite, am I right?" He laughs to himself, and you punch him in the gut. He slaps you, making sure to get the same side that was slapped before, busting your lip further and causing another small stream of blood to burst out. "Now now, kitten," he coos sadistically, grabbing your wrists in one hand and holding them above you, using his other hand to undo the buckle of his belt. "This will be over quick if you don't struggle, so just calm down..."

A glowing blue spear lands beside him, startling him into releasing his hold on you and falling to the ground. Bones throw themselves at him, glowing orange and blue. Pink bombs explode around you, causing him to scramble up into a sitting position and push himself back against the wall. You remain laying there, the blood loss and head injury causing the sounds and images to fade in and out of focus. You think you hear your name being called, but you're out of consciousness before you can answer it.

 

 

* * *

 

**"Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time"**

**Panic! At The Disco**


	2. You're Usually Pretty Good With Hangovers, But

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're nursing a KILLER hangover, but Papyrus is apparently really good at healing, so you don't have to worry about all those bullshit wounds. Feeling hella charged up with that healing energy, you suggest that everyone go to a water park.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I curse a lot so sorry not sorry

The next morning fucking sucks.

You wake up in bed, head  _pounding,_ and covered in... who even knows what. Something sticky, and brown. Gross. And it's all over your sheets.

The alarm clock on your beside table reads 8:39AM, and you groan. It's way too early for you to be waking up on a weekend. You roll back over and attempt to fall asleep, only to knock foreheads with the red-haired fish woman from last night.

You scream and jump backwards, falling off the bed and landing on your ass. _"HOLY SHIT!"_  Laughter fills the room, and you're rubbing your temples, trying to process what happened last night. You went to a new club, danced, got drunk, got high... you  _think_  you might have got in a fight. One look at your bruised wrists brings it all back, and you shoot up onto your feet. "Oh my god, Undyne—"

"HA, you, you just  _fell_ —" Undyne gasps out between fits of laughter. "— _right on your ass!_  HA! Oh my god, you jumped like four feet, three feet at least."

The blood rush from suddenly rising to your feet causes your vision to go grey, and then you're leaning back against your dresser, panting and feeling fatigued. You grip one of the drawer handles, and you slide down onto the floor. You can feel sleep calling your name. Screaming it, actually, making your head pound stronger. You've never felt hardwood more comfortable than it feels right now.

"Oh jeez, Alphys, help me get her up." You hear the rustling of the bed sheets as the two monsters exit your bed, coming around to lift you up by the armpits.

"S-She must have lost a lot of blood last night, s-she needs some food," Alphys frantically states as they drag you through the door frame and into the hallway. They lead you into the kitchen and set you down at the small table. "Uh, anything will work really, just make sure it's g-got magic in it. And she's probably dehydrated, b-because of all the alcohol. I'll get her s-some water." Undyne searches through your cabinets, pulling out boxes of Hamburger Helper and instant oatmeal, easy-to-make garbage that's been sitting in there for months. Alphys grabs a glass from the cabinet and fills it with ice from the freezer, and then water from the tap. "Uh, Jordan, y-you really shouldn't be going back to sleep right now."

You nod your head, then lay it on the table. Yeah, you probably shouldn't, you need to get some food in you before you end up sick. You're just going to rest your eyes for a while until Undyne finishes whipping up something for breakfast. Her, Alphys, and the kitchen feel so far away, and you're floating towards this warm feeling, and you almost sigh, it feels so nice.

"Dammit, Jordan!"

Undyne jabs you in the side, causing you to jump up in your seat. "I'm awake! I'm awake!" She shoves microwaved oatmeal at you, and you dig in, stomach growling at the smell of food. Alphys sets a glass of ice water down too, and you drink it as fast as you can.

"She doesn't have any food with magic in it, so we're going to have to ask Papyrus to come heal her," Undyne says, taking the last seat, the one across from Alphys and to your right. "She barely has  _any_  food. What the hell do you eat?"

"Junk, mostly," you answer between bites. You have that whole bowl down in less than a minute.

"Listen, I'm gonna call Papyrus. He's gonna come patch you up," Undyne says, pulling out her phone.

"Wait, what even happened last night?"

"After we took c-care of Jackson, you p-passed out," Alphys says. "What you did was really c-cool."

"Hell yeah it was! You totally saved my girl!" Undyne grinned at you, fist pumping in the air, phone at her ear. "I can't thank you enough for that."

You blush. "It was nothing, I just couldn't stand to see that guy hurting someone," you say. You make to get up and take care of your bowl, but Alphys pats your shoulder and takes it from you. "Oh, thanks."

She sets your dishes in the sink, then retakes her seat. "T-Thank  _you._ "

You ask the question that's been floating around your mind since you woke up to them both in your bed. "How did we end up back at my apartment?"

"After you passed out, Sans found your address in your wallet," Undyne shrugs. "We just took the cabs you called before, and brought you here. We couldn't wake you up, and it's dangerous to heal someone who's asleep, so Alphys and I stayed here with you."

"A-And you don't have a lot of room out here in the living room, but you have this huge bed, s-so Undyne said it would be fine to..."

You're quick to reassure her that you don't care about the fact that they slept next to you. "Oh no, Alphys, it's okay! My bed is huge—the previous owner left it here. I'm really glad that you guys brought me back and stayed with me."

A blush rises to her face, a smile with it. "W-We couldn't just leave you alone."

"Especially after you kicked that guy's ass for taking off with Alphys!"

"That guy, he just..." you trail off, thinking of all the rude comments and threats that he made towards Sans and his friends. "Nothing pisses me off more than people like him. No one has the right to say the things he said."

Alphys and Undyne nod. "You're right, assholes like that deserve—Papyrus! What took you so long to answer? Think you can come over to the human's place and heal her? No, not that human. Yeah, the one we met last night. No, she's still in the same spot. Alright, see you in ten! And you'd better run the whole way too! Get that morning exercise in!"

She hangs up the phone, then runs over to get her jacket from on top of the couch. Because of the space-saving open layout of your apartment, from your position you can see everything in the living room. You don't have a whole lot of furniture, since you rarely have friends over, and you'd rather spend your money on other things. In your living space you only have the loveseat, a recliner, a coffee table littered with school work, and a TV stand with a moderately small flat screen. You have a couple bean bags in the hallway closet for when you have students from class over to work on group projects, but that’s about it.

It takes Papyrus less than ten minutes to arrive, and he has his boyfriend with him. Somehow, you doubt that Mettaton ran with Papyrus, so you assume they took a car.

Undyne stands beside the door, holding it open for the two to walk in. “You didn’t have to bring that pink diva with you!”

Mettaton walks passed her and into the living room, already staking claim on the recliner. “He didn’t have to, but of course he _wanted_ to.” He grabs the remote off the coffee table and begins flipping channels. He settles for a channel featuring him, and squeals. “See, I knew they were airing it! I told them it would be a hit.”

You roll your eyes. You get the feeling that he’s always like this.

“Whatever. Papyrus, Jordan’s in here.” Undyne walks him over to you, then pulls your chair out and faces it towards her. “She’s all yours.”

“HMM. JORDAN HUMAN, HAVE YOU EVER BEEN HEALED BEFORE?” Papyrus begins examining your head, flipping through the matted hair and dry clumps of blood.

“No,” you answer easily. Monsters have been on the surface for four years, and in that time, they’ve proven how valuable their magic can be. Their food is really good at healing, and some monsters even have magic that can heal. Monsters with that kind of magic usually hang out at hospitals, or as nurses in schools. You’ve never gone to any of them though, since you’ve never been hurt enough to need a hospital in the time that they’ve been up here. But then, you wouldn’t consider the injuries you have now intense enough to require a doctor.

Maybe you just don’t like doctors.

“THEN THIS MAY FEEL STRANGE TO YOU,” Papyrus responds, placing his hands on your head. “BE PREPARED FOR AN INTENSE TINGLING SENSATION.”

You close your eyes and prepare for it. Just as he said, a tingling sensation spread across the top of your head, spreading from his fingertips. As the tingling spreads, the pain fades, replaced by warmth. Soon your head is pain free, hangover included.

“THERE! DO YOU FEEL BETTER?”

“Much better, thank you. But now that the pain in my head is gone, do you think you can work on my neck?” Because the most severe of your injuries is gone, you can feel the rest of your body aching. “I’m hurt in some other places too.” You’re gonna milk this healing thing as much as you can.

“OF COURSE!”

Alphys and Undyne join Mettaton in the living room, leaving you and Papyrus in the kitchen. You move your head to the side, showing him your neck. He places his hands there and heals you some more.

When he’s finished will all your wounds, you elect to take a much-needed shower. You hate the feeling of caked on blood covering your body. Not that you’ve ever felt that feeling before today. You didn’t tell Papyrus about the bruise inside your thigh from the creep’s dick bumping into you so much, figuring it’s better to just let that heal on its own rather than have the poor guys hands run all over you.

In the shower, you notice how energized you now feel. You feel like you can run a marathon or something. You probably won’t though, since you’ve got asthma. You figure it’s a side effect of the healing, considering how beat you were before. But you want to spend all this energy doing _something_. An idea hits you, staring at the water flow from the showerhead above you and into the drain below.

After drying off and throwing on a pair of shorts, a tank top, and some flip flops, you rush out to everyone waiting in the living room.

“Hey guys, do you—” You stop, mid-question. Not only are Alphys, Undyne, Papyrus, and Mettaton in your home, but Sans had arrived, and he brought a goat woman and a human child. “Wait, what?”

“OH HEY! I HOPE YOU DON’T MIND, JORDAN HUMAN, BUT I INVITED MY BROTHER SANS OVER!” Papyrus waves from the four-person kitchen table, where he sits across from Sans. The goat monster and preteen sit to either side of him.

“Yeah, and shorty brought Toriel and Frisk,” Undyne adds from the loveseat. She and her girlfriend, and Mettaton, hadn’t moved from their spots in the living room.

“S-Sorry about all the people, Jordan. We have no control,” Alphys says, apologizing.

“No, it’s okay. I’m actually kinda pumped to have the company,” you reassure her, and you mean it. “I was hoping that maybe you all would want to go to a water park or something? I’d like to hang out with you guys some more, since you saved me from that asshole. And I’ve got nothing planned for the day, now that we got kicked out of that club.”

“That sounds awesome!” Undyne jumps up out of her seat, startling her girlfriend. “Oh, sorry babe. But a water park sounds wicked cool! I love water!”

“YEAH, UNDYNE’S A FISH! SHE’S GOOD WITH WATER!” Papyrus also stands, apparently too excited to remain seated. “I AM NOT SO GOOD WITH WATER, APPARENTLY. SKELETONS SINK. BUT! IT STILL SOUNDS FUN!”

“Oh, that does sound lovely. I’m still not used to all this summer heat up here on the surface,” the goat woman says. “What do you think, Frisk?”

The preteen nods enthusiastically. You have no idea who those two are, but you don’t give a flying fuck at the moment, if you’re completely honest. The more the merrier.

“Well that settles it!” Mettaton strolls out to the space in between the two rooms, becoming the center of attention. “You’re all invited to MTT Water World! And fast passes for everyone! Free of charge, of course. Only the best for the friends of Mettaton!”

Undyne loudly whispers to Alphys. “He has a water park now?”

“I-I honestly have no idea what he’s d-doing anymore.”

“Right then,” you say, trying to get everyone’s attention. “Should we take some time to get ready and meet up there about... noon?”

Everyone nods excitedly, then rushes out the door to go home and get ready.

You turn around, intent on trying on your swimsuits and modelling them in front of the floor-length bathroom mirror. But you turn too fast, and bump into a body you didn’t know was there. You and the other person wind up on the ground, flat on your butts.

“oh sorry, i tried to warn ya, but you’re too quick,” Sans apologizes, standing up and dusting himself off, as if the floor were unclean.

“Hey, my floor’s not that dirty! I may not have swept in a couple months, but I’m not really messy, so...” you trail off, embarrassed about your bare minimum cleaning capabilities.

Sans laughs and holds out a hand as an offer to help you up, and you take it. “you should see my place. this place really isn’t that bad.”

You give him a playful wink, flirting, but not seriously. “Is that an invitation?”

He catches on and shoots back a wink of his own. “maybe.”

Silence rings throughout your apartment, neither of you having any idea what to say to the other. You’re curious about why he didn’t leave with the others, but you don’t ask, figuring that it would be rude to just ask why someone hasn’t left your place yet. Instead, you ask if he planned on meeting up with the others at the water park.

“oh, no. i don’t have any swim trunks,” he replies, shrugging. “actually, i was hoping to ask if you wanted to—”

“Oh man, what a lame excuse!” You laugh at him, delighting in his flushed response. “I mean, like, it’s okay to not have a swimsuit. But you can’t let that stop you. You’ve got to buy one or borrow something from your brother.”

“paps’ swim trunks would be too small and too long.”

“Damn! If only we knew someone in your size.” You try to go through your limited friend list in your head, looking for someone that fit his body type.

“really, it’s okay—”

“I’ve got it!” You rush to your room and dig through the closet, pulling out a tote of winter clothes and stuff you no longer wear and you’ve been “too busy” to donate. To your surprise, but not really because you never throw anything out, they’re still there.

You grab the blue swim trunks out and hold them out to Sans’ waist, as if testing the fit without having him put them on. “Perfect!” You toss them at him, and he catches them on reflex. “They’re my little brother’s. Or they were, before he moved out.” You poke his jacket a couple times, and grin. “Look, they’re even your favorite color.”

“how do you know if blue is my favorite color?”

“Because you wear that jacket, silly.” You grab your three swimsuits, and begin to leave the room. “Now try them on. I’m gonna be in the bathroom trying on my swimsuits from last year. I haven’t gone swimming yet this year, so I don’t know if they still fit.”

Without waiting for him to respond, you turn on your heel and walk to your bathroom. After shutting the door, you undress quickly, throwing your bra and panties into the dirty clothes hamper since you’re not going to need them while you’re swimming. You’re pretty sure at least one will fit; you haven’t lost any weight since last year, or gained any. Looking into the floor-length mirror, you can see just how little you’ve changed in the past year or two. You’re still short, and you’re still slim-thick, your waist surprisingly small compared to the size of your hips. Your figure is most of the appeal for others, and how you lure in companions for one-night-stands. You tell yourself that you’re not shallow, you just don’t want anything serious, and women get urges too.

Your face hasn’t changed much either. Your skin is still pale, your nose still dotted in a few light freckles. But even though you hate them, the freckles do look really good on you, especially with your almost fairy-like delicate facial features. Most people get surprised by you when you give them attitude, or do something rude. You figure it’s because you look like you’re supposed to be sweet.

Your eyes haven’t changed from their hazel color, but why would they? You don’t wear contacts. Your hair has changed frequently over time. You’ve always love dying your hair; right now, you actually need to re-dye it. You have it bleached blonde, and your nearly black roots are peeking through. The style is short, but too long to be a pixie cut.

You try on your first swimsuit, but quickly reject it. Somehow the top piece had gotten snagged on something, and now there’s a gaping hole across half your tit. It’s a shame though, because it fits really nicely, and it’s black. Everyone looks good in black.

The second swimsuit doesn’t have a hole in it, but it does make you look fat. You forgot that there was a reason why you never wore it.

The third suit is the real winner, both looking good on you and being functional. It’s cyan blue with white swirls, and the top dips down low enough for your boobs to be on display every time you bend down. Little white frills line the bottom of the top piece, and the top of the bottom piece.

You spin around a few times in front of the mirror, excited to be out in public, riding great water rides, and getting to know your new friends.

Speaking of new friends, it confuses you that you were so happy to see them all, and they were all so accepting of your invitation. It seems to you like they’re used to making new friends, and enjoy it a lot. The biggest part of the confusion, however, is the fact that you offered in the first place. Sure, you got lots of energy to burn, but you barely know any of them! You’d never even met the goat woman and preteen, and they were in your apartment!

But, the healing magic did give you a shit ton of energy. Maybe it gave you a lot of friendliness, since the source of the magic is so friendly himself?

A knock at the door drags you out of your thoughts, and you tell yourself to ask Papyrus about it later.

“hey, you done in there? if we’re gonna go, we only have an hour... and the park’s an hour away.”

You don’t bother with makeup, since you plan on getting wet anyway, and dash out of the bathroom in a flash, with your tank top and shorts on over your two-piece. You shove your flip flops on, grab your purse and keys, and drag Sans out behind you as you leave the apartment, locking it on the way.

“don’t worry, i already called a cab,” Sans says while you’re dragging him into the elevator, where you finally let go of his wrist. “you took a while, so i had the time.”

You lightly slap him with your purse, pretending to be offended. “I didn’t take _that_ long!”

“you’re right. just long enough for me to call a cab.”

You stick your tongue out at him, but he just winks at you in return.

“How do you do that?”

“do what?”

“Wink,” you answer. “Move. Make expressions. How are you able to make bone move?”

“magic.”

The elevator dings, and the doors open to the first floor. Natural lighting floods in and replaces the fluorescent light. You roll your eyes at him as you both step out and head past the lobby. “I know you’re made of magic. But aren’t bones really hard? How do yours just... change like that?”

You pass the double door entrance to your building, and slide into the cab when Sans opens the door for you. When he slides in after you, you grab his face and try to tug on his cheek bones. “It’s hard! I can’t feel any softness. Can you control how hard your face gets and shift it around when you make it more malleable?”

“uh, sure. yeah.” Sans’ face becomes flush, and you take your hands back, suddenly worried you’d made him uncomfortable. You tell the driver that you’re going to MTT Water World, and he drives away from your apartment complex.

 

* * *

**One Dance (feat. Wizkid & Kyla)**

**Drake**

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> *starts a second story only days after starting my first*
> 
> Yeah I have my priorities straight don't judge me


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